This is a question that everyone first asks when they look at affirmations. They say – how can they work – they’re only words? They say – it’s all just positive thinking for the chattering classes – rubbish! To be honest, I’ve heard them all and more – some too rude to write down here for your tender eyes.
So, let’s start by ascertaining what an Affirmation really is. The Concise Oxford Dictionary says: a statement of fact; a strong assertion. (Note the word “strong”, there). It is also a legal statement for those who do not wish to make a religious declaration in court, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. It seems that ANY statement we make strongly about ourselves as if it were true is an affirmation – and nowhere does the definition mention positive thinking!
How then do you use affirmations in your everyday life – and why would you? What will you gain from so doing? And more to the point – do they really work? I have to say that they very clearly DO work. All those negative, self-defeating statements that arise from your unconscious on an almost minute by minute basis are in reality Affirmations! Think about that – EVERYONE tells themselves things that prevent them from being as wonderful as they can be. And it’s all because of the little devil sitting on your shoulder drip feeding poison into your ears.
Getting the Message
So, what can you do to stop it happening? I think that the first thing you need to do is to recognise all the negative messages that you were fed along with your baby food and during your informative years. At first you didn’t remember them as words, but you did remember them as feelings and you filed them away until you had the language skills to put them into your own words. Thus, you created a set of negative affirmations about yourself. How clever is that? So, it went like this – you were disapproved of, you felt bad about yourself and then got creative in the script writing department. You wrote a script that contained all the words that described that early disapproval – and believed it to be true. Those scripts have then directed your life for ever – or they do until you decide to do something about them.
And did you notice something else, too? That the outside world and the people in it ALL reflect your inner script? You attract and create the kind of life that affirms what you believe about yourself. So that’s alright then – your parents and teachers were right about you, very comforting! Or is it? What I’m saying is that your beliefs perpetuate your reality – until, that is, you change them. So, what can you do to put this right and attract the kind of life and people that you really want, that you see others having?
The answer is simple – change your script! It’s never too late. So start writing a new set of beliefs about yourself and learn them off by heart. How did you learn to recite a poem, for example, when you were at school? Or a set of dates for your history exam? Did you write them down first? Then apply them to memory by repeating them over and over again? That’s certainly how I did it. The key here being that you learned to write them down because this acted as a mind loop – in other words, you read the information, wrote it down and then committed it to memory.
Change Your Internal Monologue
So, you need to use the same simple and highly effective technique with Affirmations. First, however, is that you must decide what inner changes you want to make and then CHOOSE your new script. Then you need to write them down, many times and commit them to memory. They must always begin with “I” – because no one can affirm for another – and then the rest of the sentence follows. Your new statements must always affirm something positive about yourself – in fact, the wording is crucial.
If you were initially told, for example, that you were a chatterbox and that was a bad thing in your family, it’s no good saying “I don’t want to keep talking” a million times, because nothing can happen. What you need to write is much more direct “I am an attractive person who is a gifted and successful speaker “. Or, if you were constantly told how willful you were, which was another bad thing to your family, you could affirm “I am strong and focused on what I want to be, do and have in my life.” This enables your mind to embrace new, positive, thoughts about yourself.
One odd thing that I’ve noticed with clients from my astrology practice is that the very area that parents make “wrong” and “bad” is actually the area in life that holds the greatest gifts and potential. I’ve also noticed that the initial script is different for each sibling in the same family. I say this simply to underline that there is more going on out there than we may realise – and it’s exciting!
The next thing to happen, because the unconscious mind is very powerful, is that you will then have those opposite thoughts arising from the depths. And they always say “No, you won’t. No, you can’t. Who do you think you are? (a good one that).” And it is this which can create despair. What you are actually saying when you despair is “My parents were right after all.” Do bear in mind though, that this stuff floating to the surface is a good thing because it enables you to see exactly what you have been telling yourself deep down inside – forever! And this is the beginning of consciousness, of self-knowledge. A positive step then is to say “Thank you” to the inner voice and CARRY ON with the Affirmations. This nasty inner voice is then disarmed and cannot harm you. This technique may take a few attempts, but try it, it works.
Another useful technique is to buy an attractive notebook in which you can write your new affirmations and read them whenever possible. It’s a good idea to get one that is small enough it can fit in a handbag or document case. Then you can have it with you all day wherever you are and can snatch a wee look every now and again as a reminder. What you are really doing here is reprogramming your mind by giving it new thoughts to occupy it. Remember – you are thinking ALL the time – let’s make them good thoughts!
The World’s Greatest Affirmer
The most famous person who constantly repeated an Affirmation for the whole world to hear in the 1960’s was a little-known boxer by the name of Cassius Clay. He stated “I am the Greatest!” And people laughed. Clay kept on saying “I am the Greatest!” and people kept on laughing. Until one day, he became the greatest boxer the world has ever known. Most of you will know that Cassius Clay also changed his name in mid-stream to Mohammed Ali !
That is how Affirmations work, folks. Just try them.
